Regret a certain child

Eat this! Six (almost) unbeatable tips for delicious sandwiches

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The lunch break is known to be one of the most important meals for school children. It provides energy and ensures that the students can concentrate and pay attention in class. The big problem: Children don't eat their lunch break, but bring their lunch box home unopened from school every day. Or even worse: they take a bite off of their sandwich to make it unmistakably clear to their parents that the sandwich is so inedible that they are more likely to finish their used sports equipment than to take a second bite.

Sure, there are always reports of children who like to plaster their sandwiches with enthusiasm, but that falls under the heading of the summer hole report and is about as credible as the headlines “Giant anaconda discovered in the Rhine” or “Two-headed goat wins Lambada -Competition". Instead, according to a recent study by Fake University, the number of parents who suffer from a lunch phobia has been increasing steadily for years. These unfortunate fathers and mothers break into sweats when they open their children's lunch boxes from which they sneer at the spurned loaves of bread. All day long they think about this horrible moment, so that they are often unable to work. ("A sandwich to rule them.")

This need not be! To save you this fate, you should read my six tips for perfect sandwiches to heart.

1. The eye eats too

You have to put in a little more effort with the design of the sandwich if you want your little gourmet to eat it too | © jelly / If you had the choice of having a meal that looks like it was slapped into a metal bowl in a jail kitchen, or that was finely presented and garnished with a few decorative spices, you would definitely go for the second option . Your children may feel the same way. Instead of giving you a joyless brown bread collapsible day in and day out, you have to offer some entertainment in the Vesper box. That's the way it is with these pleasure-seeking youth in today's fun society.

It's not that difficult at all. Just get up at 4 a.m., smear bread and then cut out circles, stars, flowers, etc. Then you will carve small sculptures and animal figures out of fruits and vegetables. Finally, arrange your children's snack in specially developed so-called bento boxes with food mandalas that appear psychedelic.

However, this lunch break approach, aimed at the children's addiction to pleasure, also has serious disadvantages. Apart from the time required and getting up early, not all parents have the fine motor dexterity of Erzgebirge artisans. Then the carved carrot does not look like a lifelike Tyrannosaurus Rex, but like a mammoth slain by a comet. In addition, children are usually not so easily fooled. Just because a kohlrabi comes in the shape of a dinosaur, it still tastes like a goofy kohlrabi.

2. You shall covet your neighbor's lunch

While children usually disregard the sandwiches made by their own parents, they find the sandwiches of their friends much more attractive. You can take advantage of this by consulting with other parents. In the evening you make the bread for your child, prepare fruit and prepare drinks. Then you bring the ham sandwich to Sabine's parents, from whom you receive a cheese roll, you hand in your apple wedges at Paul's parents and take a can of grapes with you before you finally deliver the fruit tea to Nurcan's parents, who in return give you a fruit juice spritzer. The next day your child will swap bread with Sabine, fruit with Paul and drink with Nurcan and every child will have the Vespers prepared by their parents.

Admittedly, from an ecological point of view, it is questionable if all parents race back and forth through the city every evening to deliver sandwiches & Co., but this price has to be paid so that the children are adequately supplied with nutrients and vitamins. The much greater disadvantage of this lunch exchange gyro is anyway that it depends on the very fragile and changeable social network of relationships within the class community. If your child falls out with Sabine, Paul and Nurcan, they will definitely not want to swap their food with them anymore because they are completely stupid.

3. Itself is the child

Say hello to the new permanent state of your kitchen when your child prepares his own lunch | © chefkeem / If you ever get tired of preparing bread every morning that your child brings back untouched in the afternoon, then just let them prepare their own snack. If it covers its sandwiches for itself, it can hardly complain about the disgusting smelly cheese or the ham sausage, which supposedly tastes like poop. After all, it put it on its own. Okay, children often argue more irrationally than Donald Trump at the UN General Assembly and will still blame you for not having enjoyed the lunch break. That is the fate that parents have to endure.

By taking this do-it-yourself approach, you increase the likelihood that your child will have their school lunch by a few percentage points. However, you have to accept that you have to wake up your morning-grouchy child half an hour earlier, which turns it into a nuclear warhead that can explode at any time. In addition, you shouldn't be so naive as to think that your child is tidying up the kitchen after smearing bread. Rather, it will create so much chaos that you will have to take half the day off to renovate the kitchen and restore the cabinetry.

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4. Think about the vitamins!

Fruit and vegetables should be an important part of your children's snack box, because the vitamin intake ensures mental freshness and an alert mind. The German Nutrition Society (DGE) recommends, for example, radishes, kohlrabi or kiwi for a healthy break breakfast. "Bite-sized, they are becoming a popular finger food among children and young people." A statement that suggests that the DGE nutritionists are childless. Here is another piece of evidence. "Cress, chives, parsley or basil, for example, add the right flavor to the sandwiches." Do you know a child who likes to eat cress, chives, parsley or basil? Yes? Then it probably grew up with the two-headed goat dancing lambada.

Nevertheless, you shouldn't do without fruit and vegetables in your children's lunch box. For example, to appear more responsible in order to maintain a balanced diet for their children of concerned parents. It is actually enough to give your children bananas, peppers and apples made of plastic. They don't spoil and aren't that heavy either. But in your own interest, you should actually pack real fruit and vegetables for your children. Then you will always have a healthy afternoon snack when you clear out the lunch box. Here, too, there is a recent study by Fake University, which says that for parents, the fruits and vegetables that their children scorn are the most important source of vitamins. I find that conclusive. Or do you know parents who suffer from scurvy?

5. Sweets for my sweet

Take an example: This is what the perfect sandwich looks like, if your little one has their way | © Cris DiNoto / Of course there is a tactic in which you can be 100 percent sure that your child will eat their lunch box empty to the last crumb. Simply smear Nutella as thick as a finger on cardboard white flour toast and cover any fruit with liquid chocolate. (You can leave out the vegetable quatsch completely.) Your child will love you for it and nothing stands in the way of your choice of “Parents of the Year”. (Especially if you also allow your child to gamble on their mobile phones around the clock.)

Of course, this chocolate method is not entirely undisputed and you'd better keep it to yourself. Other parents would hardly react more indignantly to this than if you gave their child a crack pipe every day to increase his performance.

6. Lubricate it like Jamie

If you shy away from Nutella sandwiches, you should consider whether your child's sandwich is too unimaginative and unimaginative and is therefore boycotted. Every day sloppy mixed wheat bread from the bakery with thick butter, topped with rubbery cheese or sausage made under questionable conditions are really boring.

Try a more exquisite creation and be inspired by Jamie Oliver. "Jamie Oliver ?!" you may be screaming now. “That's the guy who punishes his children with hot chili peppers. That is probably not possible! ”You are of course right, but you shouldn't let him give you any parenting tips, but rather cook his lunchbox recipes. (Just as questionable as Jamie Oliver's punishment methods is the naming of his children. They are called Buddy Bear Maurice, Petal Blossom Rainbow, Poppy Honey Rosie, Daisy Boo Pamela and River Rocket Blue. Jamie Oliver himself probably has too often on the sharp ones Sucked chilli pods.)

But back to the topic. Exquisite sandwich creations. For example, prepare a crunchy poppy seed roll with fried chorizo ​​sausages, homemade chickpea and tomato spread and rocket. Wondering if your child will like this? Of course not, but they have a very tasty dinner. And here is the ultimate tip, which I wrote down in an earlier column: It's best to eat the sandwich right after it has been prepared. Then it tastes best and your child doesn't have to drag it to school for free. Good Appetite!

The scoyo podcast #scoyolo provides further impulses for a stress-free everyday school family life: For easier learning

More columns by Christian Hanne here in ELTERN! Magazine:

About the author

Christian Hanne, born in 1975, grew up in the Westerwald and, as a child, read too much by Ephraim Kishon and watched too much "Naked Cannon". He now lives in Berlin-Moabit with his wife and their two children. On his blog “Family Business”, on Twitter and Facebook, he writes about the normal everyday madness. In culinary terms, he has an obsessive passion for cheesecake. Even with raisins. Otherwise he is reasonably stable mentally.

On October 17th, his new book, “A father grabs the bottle. Fabulous from parental leave ”in Seitenstraßenverlag.


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